you're my rushmore.

i haven't heard something that inspired me this much in a longggggg time. Cara Beth Satalino is an absolute genius.. simplicity in her instrumentation, but her voice penetrates and manipulates sound. mesmerizing beauty.

i've had a dry spell for about a month now.. and i think i'm ready to settle back in front of the drawing board and give it some more. 

music you taunting beast. constantly toying with my mind and playing games. 

i'm ready to express myself again.

ps. she definitely gets mod points for the gnarly scarf.

p.s.s. first love, is like a lightning bolt in a bottle? yes. passion. pierces. weakens. burns. melts. transforms. forever changed. forever effected. forever different than before. and a sense of identity of 'form' will always be traced back to that initial strike of .. whatever that flash was. whatever that moment of 'time-standing-still' was. 

flash. sense. experience. and walk away forever changed. 

let the poets cry themselves to sleep..

i'm falling..

i'm falling..

"you're the yellow bird that i've been waiting for"

"the sound of loneliness makes me happier.."

and so the pages begin.

i've been inspired.

i have far too many vivid memories that continuously play through my mind day in and day out. 

they desperately need to be expressed.

i'm beginning a book.

a book of short stories. passions. delights. sorrow.

but if i told you the over all theme..

you'd say i was a sappy mo fo. 

so we'll leave that one to mystery and intrigue. 

lyrics

He is sensible and so incredible

and all my single friends are jealous

he says everything i need to hear

and it's like i couldn't ask for anything better.

he opens up my door and i get into his car and he says

you look beautiful tonight.

and i feel perfectly fine.

but i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

and it's 2am and i'm cursing your name

you're so in love that you act insane

and that's the way i loved you.

breaking down and coming undone

its a roller coaster kinda rush

and i never knew i could feel that much

and that's the way i loved you.

he respects my space

and never makes me wait

and he calls exactly when he says he will

he's close to my mother 

and talks business with my father

he's charming and endearing 

and i'm comfortable.

he cant see the smile i'm faking

and my hearts not breaking

cause i'm not feeling anything at all

and you were wild and crazy

just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated,

got away by some mistake.

but i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

and it's 2am and i'm cursing your name

you're so in love that you act insane

and that's the way i loved you.

breaking down and coming undone

its a roller coaster kinda rush

and i never knew i could feel that much

and that's the way i loved you.

loving and trying not to.

My head is spinning down a million spirals.

Words are futile at this point.